The “X” in Texas has been found dead.
A UT student, only recently turned twenty, was found dead after an apparent fall from a four-story building. Police are still investigating. But, when I heard that he was a member of the Texas Hellraisers, I pretty much assumed I knew what had happened.
The Texas Hellraisers are a “spirit” organization, something that has probably been the subject of endless bad puns. They are the drunkest people I have ever met. That’s their objective. They get hammered, paint their bodies, and scream at Texas sporting events. Lots of people do that all over the country, but the Texas Hellraisers do it an inch away from alcohol poisoning by design. This guy was the “X” in TEXAS.
They spend the rest of their time bailing each other out of jail and checking up on each other in the emergency room. No, really.
As part of their initiation, they have to drink a shot for each letter of
L – O – N – G – H – O – R – N
H – E – L – L – R – A – I – S – E – R – S
That’s right, a shot for each letter. They write the letters on their forearms because they’d lose track otherwise. That’s nineteen shots.
After that, the pledge has to chug a beer and puke, hitting a target.
So, you can see why I automatically assume that Mr. X, visiting friends, was dead drunk and just plain fell off the building. His friends must have passed out, because no one noticed he was missing. The body was found the next day by a passer-by.
.
January 28, 2009 at 1:36 am
Funny how you act as if you actually know what happened. It was his friends that went looking for him, and it was his friends that found him the next day. Your insensitivity is astounding. Regardless of your disapproval of any group of people, you should have some respect for the death of a human being and the loss that the person’s friends and family must endure.
January 28, 2009 at 2:08 am
For you to assume anything is horrible. I wonder if your assumption is even based on having met a student from the school or just some off handed remark you caught at lucnh sometime.
April 23, 2009 at 9:22 am
Have you ever even met a Hellraiser you sorry piece of shit? If you’re going to write shit like this you should at least get you facts straight.
“But, when I heard that he was a member of the Texas Hellraisers, I pretty much assumed I knew what had happened.”
So you obviously have no fucking clue what you are talking about. Your lack of respect for human life shows how fucking sad a person you really are.
I’ve known Hellraisers for 4 years now and I’ve never once seen any of them go to jail or the hospital. They are just guys that like to have a good time and watch sports.
As for the shots. 1. They haven’t had that party in years. 2. It’s not an initiation. Just a party. You don’t have to drink. 3. It spells T-E-X-A-S L-O-N-G-H-O-R-N-S using only 1/4-1/2 of a shot so really only like 6 shots max.
I’m guessing a Hellraiser hurt your feelings one time and that’s why you have a drippy vagina. You fucking faggot.
October 31, 2009 at 6:33 pm
this post is fucking stupid.
someone should find the dumb bitch who wrote this and punch them in the jaw.
I didnt know VanBuren but I know he is dearly missed. show some fucking respect, asshole.
Yea, Hellraisers like to get drunk. But, we’re in fucking college. Hit up ANY other student organization, especially frats, and you’ll find something else to talk shit about besides the death of a great person. fuck off.